His Eye is on the Sparrow

I woke up to the sound of birds chirping outside my window, so I stretched and smiled and went to open the blinds, thinking the forecasters had been wrong. By some miracle, instead of rain, wind, and incessant gray, I would find sunshine on the other side of the window pane. No such luck.

Instead, I found a crow hanging nearly upside down from the roof of the sparrow family's bird house on my porch, while mom and dad sparrow hopped from branch to branch in the nearby tree, angrily, frantically calling for the crow to leave their unhatched eggs alone, alone!

Out in the pouring rain, those tiny little sparrows sat, while the crow, safe under our porch roof, took it's time, peeking it's head into the too small hole, reaching, reaching, for precious, tiny eggs. I watched as one of the sparrows took flight and bombed the crow, who lost his footing and squawked angrily. I watched those little birds fight with all their might and I willed them to win.

Rationality told me that interference didn't make sense. Wild things live and die according to chance and the laws of nature, just as we do, albeit we pretend control. But, really, could I save the sparrow eggs? Maybe not forever. Maybe they'd never hatch, but damn it, I could give them a chance. I ran outside, barefoot, and clapped my hands, "get out of here!" The crow looked at me with disdain, not leaving his perch, but only tilting his head at me.

I clapped my hands and went right up to him, "Shoo! Get out of here." He finally gave up his perch. Before I could step back, mom and dad sparrow were swooping at my head with far more courage than they showed to their foe, the crow. I ducked and ran back inside the house, getting soaking wet in the process of zig-zagging away from the sparrows.

Some people see sparrows as pests. I don't. They mate for life. Did you know that? And their social behavior is very like that of humans. I feel an affinity for them. They're so tiny in this great big world, so fiercely protective of their children.

The first time I rescued a sparrow, I was a little girl staying with my Grandma Grace. We found the mother dead and the nest on the ground, with one baby bird still alive in it. We put it in a box in the garage and created a nest. Grandma gave me a hot water bottle to put under the tiny bird. We fed it with everything from mashed bugs to bits of bread. We didn't know what to feed a sparrow. Grandma let me sleep by it.

It was dead in the morning. We put it in a box lined with fabric from a dress grandma was sewing, and we buried it. My tough, no-nonsense grandma didn't chastise me for caring so much about a baby bird. I could tell she understood.

Part of me wasn't just fighting for that baby bird, I was fighting for me. For every hurt thing that didn't really have a chance.

It was the same today, when I ran out to chase the damn crow away. He has his eye on that nest of sparrows and he won't give it up. Crows are smart and determined and love a challenge. He'll likely get an egg or two but I've watched every year as nest after nest of fledglings take flight from that particular bird house. I've also scooped up more than a few and set them safely atop a branch before a predator could grab them.

Some never make it. Every year, when I clean out the bird house, I find a smashed egg or two, tiny little partly formed baby sparrows, fetal-like hatchlings with nearly translucent skin showing between bits of downy fluff. I cry over all of them. I'm in good company. In the bible, Matthew tells us that even God watches over the sparrows.

I sat for awhile and watched the birdhouse after I came in. I towel-dried my hair and shivered, wrapped myself in a blanket, and sat watching the rain and the little birds. A pair of Mallards landed in our little pond. I've never seen a Mallard smile but this pair seemed happy. Then, I realized that in spite of the pouring rain and the gray sky, birds were singing everywhere. They feel Spring in the air. They're joyful in the midst of the rain and cold. Even the sparrow parents seemed content again.

And so it goes.


©Just Kate, April 2010

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23comments:

[hide] Angie (Milligan) said...

I absolutely love reading everything you write. You have such a way with words that one is compelled to truly FEEL and to think, which is something I treasure. I am blessed by your friendship. xoxo

on April 6, 2010 at 10:59 AM
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[hide] Just Kate said...

Seeing you here made me smile hugely, Angie. =D I love that you see this is more than just a little vignette. The blog is a true picture of my morning and some of the attendant thoughts that came as I ran out into the rain and watched the whole scene with the birds. It got me to thinking (imagine that!) and I thought that instead of trying to spell out what I was thinking, I'd simply share the moment and see if it made anybody else think, too. ♥

on April 6, 2010 at 11:16 AM
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[hide] Anonymous said...

aww kate...lovely.. funny how I'm kid of going through the same thing. I was watering a plant the other day and a little tiny bird flew out , and I discovered a tiny nest with three eggs, I had to extract he nest from the plant and put it safely back in the big pot that the plant was in, covered it with some branches and was pleasantly surprised to see Momma on her nest..I check ~ileeneeveryday...she is till there..and I'm hopeful...

on April 6, 2010 at 11:09 AM
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[hide] Just Kate said...

I love it that you said you're hopeful. That's how I feel, too. At first, I felt so amazingly happy to think we might have sunshine, then utterly disappointed by the incessant rain and gray, but watching the birds and their plight, considering the perspective of the crow and the sparrow and, maybe, just maybe, God, I realized that the world is full of beauty and hope and that every now and then a small, helpless thing survives against all odds. Well, that's the tip of the iceberg anyway. You know me, I'm always thinking. :)

I love the way you love the creatures we share our world with. ♥

on April 6, 2010 at 11:20 AM
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[hide] Anonymous said...

I like the way you titled this. Right away I thought of the old church hymn His Eye is on the Sparrow, then I read the blog and saw that you referenced the bible after you mention that the crow's eye is on the sparrow. Themes of good and evil or ying and yang here. The crow has one goal, to get to the sparrow. He's not driven by a desire to destroy but by nature. One would suppose God casts a benevolent eye on the sparrow but he won't intervene as you did. Much to chew on here.

on April 6, 2010 at 12:12 PM
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[hide] Just Kate said...

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on April 6, 2010 at 12:26 PM
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[hide] Anonymous said...

You paint beautiful pictures with your words, Kate. I feel like I'm right there with you... but when I read the last comment you made I got a headache... I'm not deep like you.

on April 6, 2010 at 1:07 PM
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[hide] Just Kate said...

Thank you for your kind words. It's perfectly okay to just enjoy the story. :)

As always, I appreciate it when people read and comment, regardless of whether or not they want to engage a discussion. Really. :)

on April 6, 2010 at 1:14 PM
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[hide] Just Kate said...

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on April 6, 2010 at 1:22 PM
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[hide] Anonymous said...

Awesome blog, as always, Kate. xoxo

on April 6, 2010 at 2:13 PM
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[hide] Chickee said...

Sparrows, robins, crows, starlings... I love them all and I would have ran out in the rain to chase the crow away also. Because I think of the crow as bigger and stronger, a bully. I think of the sparrows as tiny and soft, not weak just soft.

I have been dive bombed by sparrows before and it's a bit scary. Those little guys in actuality are not only feisty but very strong willed. Still I persist in seeing them as soft, stupid arrogant human that I am. They know they can chase away a human easier than a crow. LoL

I have also seen baby birds crowd themselves from a nest. Pushing and shoving until their siblings, one by one fall to the ground. Only the strong survive right? But still I have tried many a time to help these tiny birds.

We learned in school that many types of birds lay 'extra' eggs because of predators stealing them for lunch. This ensures a new generation will be hatched.

So maybe the sparrows while not wanting to lose an egg, were resigned to the fact that one or two eggs might have to be sacrificed so that the rest could live.

Harsh I know, but maybe in God's plan this is how they AND the crow survive.

Ok enough of all those deep thoughts.

This reminded me of my Grammy and her love of "her song birds". Your tenasity in chasing the crow away. THAT was my grammy through and through. =) Right down to the damn it. =) ♥

on April 6, 2010 at 2:39 PM
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[hide] Just Kate said...

Your comment has me smiling. Yes, the Sparrows are plucky little bastards, aren't they! =D I laugh when I see great big human beings ducking and running as if a little bitty sparrow is going to actually hurt them, although I've heard that they can deliver a hell of a peck! lol

They're interesting because they try to fight whereas other birds like Killdeer will pretend to be wounded and create a ruckus to draw potential predators away from their nests. Killdeer are WAY bigger than sparrows. I'm sure they've evolved in separate ways for a reason.

As for baby birds pushing their siblings from the nest, yes. The bigger siblings will often crowd the smaller ones out at feeding time, too, so that the smallest die. Some would say survival of the fittest. I'm not sure what I think about that as I could easily compare myself to a smaller bird, pushed out of the nest by a bigger sibling... There's something cruel about the world, almost by design - cruelty and beauty, hand in hand.

Then you mentioned those extra eggs and my mind ran to artificial insemination and the way that people will freeze embryos and implant multiples, hoping one or two will take, sometimes ending up with an entire litter of children, other times aborting a few... I know that one scenario is NATURAL and the other one is UNNATURAL but there's an odd similarity there and some might use that natural process to justify the unnatural one. Hm...

But going back to the crow and sparrow, what does it say about God if it's part of his plan that some die so that others can live? Oh, yeah, right, that's the story of CHRIST, isn't it? But the whole of it bothers me deeply.

And people talk about heaven being a place that's "perfect," where each of US are made perfect. Hm... I'll go along with the no-death-and-destruction thing but don't our imperfections make us beautiful? Doesn't God love us exactly as we are? So why "perfect" after death? *tilts head* You mean there's no beautiful mess? I'll cease to be a human fractal, I'll just be a simple, perfect thing?

Okay, I'll stop. Yes, my grandma was the same way, Chris! A mouse once ran through a family gathering and while we all jumped up in shock, my tiny little Grandma Grace cooling lifted up her foot and stomped on it. *BOOM* Dead mouse. She was practical as all get out, but still she had compassion for a sparrow. I couldn't do it. I'll defend a small thing that's in jeopardy or a hurting thing, but I couldn't just kill something like that. If my dad were alive he would tell you I'm not nearly practical enough. :)

And that, my friend, was a brief glimpse into the inside of my head! LOL Scary place.

on April 6, 2010 at 3:48 PM
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[hide] Just Kate said...

@Montréal Mystique Tarot and Astrology

Thanks, Duncan. You're lovely. xoxo

on April 6, 2010 at 3:31 PM
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[hide] Chickee said...

hehehe I am so glad you could follow that mess of a comment I left ya. =)

You know, even with it being just a few days past Easter I didn't click on the sacrificing of His son thing until you just mentioned it. True.

hmmmm artificial insemination. Yes yes. I looked into it and could not wrap my brain around how they will fertilize so many eggs, to be frozen for later or implant 6 embryos hoping for one or two to "take". It is horrible to me. I believe that a child is created the instant of conception. So even though I was looking into that it would have been horrible for me to allow hem to fertilize more eggs than children I wanted. *sigh* But I was desperate enough i would have probably talked myself into it had that route been a viable on for me.

And OMG! HAHAHAAA!! Your Gradma STOMPED a mouse!! MY Grammy used to place sticks as ramps in the feed barrels if a mouse got stuck in there, so it could get out. LoL She did that a time or two when a mouse got stuck in the bath tub too. =) She was a sucker for the underdog. =) Maybe that's why she loved me so well.

Heaven. I too hope that it is not perfect. That would make for an extremely boring eternity. Where I sure hope I don't have as many trials as I have right now. I do hope for fun and exctiement and maybe even a tornado or two. =)

It's not scary in your head at all. I might never know what I am going to see around the next corner but I know it will be something interesting. ♥

on April 6, 2010 at 7:59 PM
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[hide] Just Kate said...

I love that you'll chase tangents with me, Chickee! =D I understand that people really, really, really want to make their own babies and that's cool. Modern science helps us in innumerable ways, why not help with making babies, too? Right? But I DO NOT get the idea of making so many and "over-planting," knowing full well that you may end up randomly killing one or more of your children... (I, too, believe that life starts at conception.) I simply cannot wrap my mind around it. Worse still, are people who keep those embryos (aka: babies) frozen indefinitely because they don't want to give them up. They can't imagine someone else raising their baby? WHAT. THE. HELL?!!! They CAN imagine a baby frozen forever but they can't imagine it growing and living and being loved???? How incredibly selfish can people be????????? If you're going to do something like that then let it be a blessing to others. There are so many people who would give anything to have a baby. It seems like someone who knows exactly what that feels like would be willing to help.

OH, I used to get SPANKED for rescuing mice! I was a bad girl and would pry them away from the kitty and set them loose again in the garden. I was willing to be spanked over and over and over again for that crime. I couldn't stand to see the kitty-cat TORTURE them to death. It would be one thing to eat it, but to play with it until it died? I love cats but I can't for the life of me figure out why they're genetically wired to play with their food!!!

We both had cool Grandmas, I think! Mine stomped a mouse and would chop the head of a chicken without batting an eye, but she respected and valued my care of the sparrow. I loved that about her. :0)

on April 6, 2010 at 10:30 PM
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[hide] Jay said...

You have the biggest heart! I would have been like you...chasing that crow away from the nest, trying my darndest to give those babies a chance at life. Back in the 70s, when I was in highschool, we rescued a baby sparrow we found in the warehouse of the grocery store we worked in. That sparrow fit in a match box! My girlfriends Mom was great with animals, and she took care of that baby sparrow. She nursed it to health and that sparrow lived in her house for years! Never had a cage, she let the bird fly around in the house. Very tame, it would come up to you for a snack if you had something she wanted.

on April 6, 2010 at 8:08 PM
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[hide] Just Kate said...

You have a big heart too, Jay. Birds of a feather flock together. Arr arr. ;P

My husband and I know a couple who had a cat that literally showed up on their doorstep holding a baby sparrow gently in it's mouth one day. She called me in a frenzy wondering what to do with it and I brought over all the stuff she would need (yes, I do happen to have bird stuff in the attic!) and she and her hubby put it in a cage and raised it. (They now have "formula" for baby birds! How cool is that?) It didn't enjoy the freedom of your friend's bird, but it was still pretty cool.

The weird thing was that their cat disappeared the day after it left the bird. :( One of those unhappy coincidences.

on April 6, 2010 at 10:35 PM
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[hide] Anonymous said...

I was sad...coming here made me smile again! Oh, how I've missed your words :)

on April 6, 2010 at 9:59 PM
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[hide] Just Kate said...

I'm glad you're not sad anymore - that makes me smile - and I'm glad you came, whoever you are. :) Thank you for letting me know you were here.

on April 6, 2010 at 10:37 PM
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[hide] Eccentricity said...

I had to laugh when I got an image of the sparrows chasing you--gotta love it! :-)

When I was a little kid still living in the country, I remember my mom pointing out bird egg nests a couple times--little tiny eggs are what I recall and my fascination with them.

on April 7, 2010 at 7:27 PM
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[hide] Just Kate said...

Hey, girl, great to see you! They did chase me off the front porch and into the rain, come to think of it! lol

on April 7, 2010 at 9:55 PM
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[hide] Anonymous said...

As a Newbie, I am always searching online for articles that can help me. Thank you Wow! Thank you! I always wanted to write in my site something like that. Can I take part of your post to my blog?.

on January 21, 2011 at 2:23 AM
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[hide] Just Kate said...

Newbie - Thank you for visiting.

You are welcome to quote me with proper citation and a link back to my blog.

on January 21, 2011 at 8:23 AM
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    About Me

    I love laughter, wickedness, fearlessness, irreverence, and kindness. I love road trips where I can prop my bare feet up on the dashboard. I love the feel of sunshine warm against my bare skin, the smell of the mountains and the roar of the ocean. I love to read. I love to challenge conventional thinking. I'm a huge fan of spirituality but have little tolerance for religion. I love to talk faith and philosophy. I love children. I get bored far too easily. I love debate and people who don't try too hard. I love it when people aren't afraid to disagree with me and know why they believe what they believe.

    Music

    Things that sound like music to me: rain on a tin roof, the trill of birds first thing in the morning, the coo and gurgle of happy babies, the beat of African drums, the roar of the ocean as the tide ebbs and flows, the sound of a rushing river, unrestrained laughter, the wind moving through leaves, the tick-tock of my grandma's old clock, the crash of thunder, a quiet whisper in my ear, the contented purr of a cat, the musical ting ting of wind chimes, children laughing, the sizzle sizzle sound of something yummy cooking, and the rustle of dry leaves under my feet.

    I also enjoy many musicians and bands including: Ray LaMontagne, Jason Mraz, The Black Eyed Peas, John Mayer, James Carrington, CCR, REM. My favorite genre is acoustic folk/rock.

    Favorite Quotes

    "We are what we repeatedly do; excellence, then, is not an act but a habit." —Aristotle

    "The most authentic thing about us is our capacity to create, to overcome, to endure, to transform, to love and to be greater than our suffering." - Ben Okri

    "What we think, or what we know, or what we believe is, in the end, of little consequence. The only consequence is what we do."—John Ruskin