|
Some would say I've gone astray. You see, I don't attend church anymore. Unless you think of laying in the grass, listening to birds chirp, basking in the sun, or walking barefoot in the garden while being extraordinarily aware of God, church experiences. If you do, then I can honestly say that I love my church and I'll never leave it. :) Why have I stopped attending scheduled church services in scheduled meeting places? There are too many reasons for me to address in one blog. One of the biggest reasons is that the church works so hard to teach and enforce the rules to the masses that it's often blind to the needs of individuals. When I went to church I was always worried about doing the right thing and following God's will. I thought I needed to do this or that hard thing to be right with Him. There's a perverse sort of pride that comes with giving up what one loves or wants for the sake of "following God's will."
Here's a novel idea: what if God simply loves us without the requirement of religion? What if there is no getting right with God there's just "with God?"
So much of what we're taught ABOUT God simply binds us up. It doesn't free us. I think of King David and what a joyful sinner he was and what an incessant WHINER, too. Yet he was a man after God's own heart. I think about that a lot. The Pharisees were busy rocking the rules and looking good, but God was enamored of this adulterer and murderer who was so incredibly blessed yet whined like a baby about every little thing, then jumped and sang and shouted. :)
David was AUTHENTIC. He was real. He represents each of us in our humanity, I think. Yet, instead of emulating him in his authenticity, we somehow end up wanting to emulate the Pharisees! THAT is what I see happening in churches and in religion as a whole.
I'm not suggesting that one should go out and murder and commit adultery. I'm simply suggesting that God may be far less concerned with rules and religion than he is with, say, seeing his people love one another.
I haven't gone astray and I'm not lost. I simply let go of religion and found my way back to God.
©Just Kate, March 2010
Enjoy this blog? Receive alerts when new blogs are posted. Just click on the "Follow" button to the right. You can also check out my other blog at: http://www.unequivocalkate.com/
Posts
20comments:
Post a Comment
What an awesome writing Katy. I agree with every bit of this! Love, Annette B.
What an awesome writing Katy. I agree with every bit of this! Love, Annette B.
Wonderful line, Kate! It isn't about rules, rituals, or religion.
That is what Jesus had the hardest time with. None of that makes you "right" with God. What makes you right with God is love, compassion, peace, grace, patience, joy. Those are the notes God plays, and those are the notes that keep us in tune with God. It is then that you are "with God".
As you know, I do still attend church on a regular basis. As I read this blog, I was thinking...why? Why do I still go?
I think one of the main reasons is that I love to sing those praise choruses! I sound so much better when I have others to drown me out!
I can sing on my own, but it just isn't quite as inspirational!
I've been going to a new church the past couple months, and I really, really enjoy this pastor's messages. He drives home the authenticity of the heart and the sinfulness of religiosity. He's a black pastor in his mid 30s; the congregation is about 50% black as well...and being new, I don't really know anyone right now, but his messages inspire me...so I guess I also still go for the inspiration. But here is the weird thing, Kate. As much as I enjoy God and church...most of my friends are outside the church! The people I hang out with...mainly my running friends...are a mix of spiritual and non spiritual people. Most of them go to church, in fact the owner of Fleet Feet has a degree in religios studies and his assistant is a seminary graduate. But there isn't an air of "religiosity" about any of us...in fact, when we get together, the beer flows freely and the laughter is contagious. No one is proselytizing, we all...christian and non-christian alike, just live life as authentically as possible. We celebrate birthdays together, we console each other should the need arise...one of our runners has a daughter with leukemia, basically we just love on each other...and i do believe that is the gospel in a nutshell! Anyway, I'm rambling again. Just keep living your life out in grace, peace, and love and you will be just fine in my book, Kate!
Annette, You always make me smile! =D I love your mom's definition of Christian. She's right on!
Our youngest daughter LOVES to go to church and is part of a great youth group. We encourage her to do whatever feels right for her. :0) Our oldest son is very like me, I think. He may pop in here and agree or disagree, but I think I can safely say that he is deeply spiritual but has no use for religion, which astounds me because he was raised so solidly in the church. We were MISSIONARIES, for heaven's sake! :) The thing is, we always taught him to be a critical thinker, to question and quest and search for truth. That's all I want for my children when it comes to spirituality is to find the path that's right for them.
Annette, Imma believe that you said it twice because you felt so adamant! LOL
Love you, my friend!
"...Brennan Manning wrote The Ragamuffin Gospel "for the bedraggled, beat-up, and burnt-out," the marginalized folks to whom Jesus ministered: the children, the ill, the tax collectors, the women. In other words, the ragamuffins. Manning understands better than most that behind our facades of order and self-assurance are inadequacies that can find healing only in Jesus. While the powerful and religious elite challenged him, Jesus embraced and healed and fed the needs of the ragamuffins. Jesus delivered love, healing, and, most of all, grace..." ~ The Amazon Review
I have this book that is masterfully written by this man that speaks to me on many levels. Your Blog brought tears to my eyes because I agree so much with what you have wrote. When I do attend Church, I attend a "NON-DENOMINATIONAL" Church for a reason, I want to hear about "God's Grace", not what the current rules are or how we need to worship.
Thank you for such a wonderful Blog my dearest of friends! I am a Ragamuffin Christian Katy, beat up by rules that leave my head spinning.
With deep respect and love,
~Calvin
I've heard you sing, Jay, and you don't need a congregation to back you up! :) That being said, I know what you mean about praise and worship. I think that's the only thing I miss about church. Where else can a grown-up go and sing out loud and strong with a bunch of other people, most of whom can't really carry a tune, and just feel love?!
I think I would like your church VERY MUCH. As a tangent, I know a few church Christians who drink beer but they won't own it. They drink on the sly amongst only the most trusted of friends. The rational is they don't want to "cause someone else to stumble." I think it's hogwash. They're more likely worried that they'll be judged. I think it's about time that church Christians stood up and said, "Hey, this is who I REALLY am," and just dropped the pretense.
Oh, who am I to judge? I have my opinions about it all and I'm definitely not in love with the institution of church or the many religions of man.
I love people like you who have an innate sense of spirituality. And you're REAL. I don't hear the same tired old Christian platitudes. For all the talk of "authenticity" in Christian circles, I feel hard pressed to find it.
The Pharisees asked Jesus about the greatest commandment in the Law (See Matthew 22:36-40). His answer stunned them: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.
THAT is my religion. I do not believe that the bible is the literal, infallible Word of God, but I believe the heartbeat of God is found there: love.
I am a fan of Brennan Manning and love The Ragamuffin Gospel best of all!
I don't feel beat up by the church. The last church we attended was full of sincere, good people. It's not due to anything they said or did that I left the institution of church behind. It simply stopped making sense to me. Did I see things that bothered me: Inconsistencies, hypocrisy, questionable action? Yes. Was I unfairly judged? I believe I was. That being said, where in the world doesn't that happen?!! A church is really a microcosm of the world. People are people and we are ALL inconsistent, hypocritical, and, yes, questionable! LOL I might as well lump myself in with that group.
What I'm trying to say is that I don't perceive our past church as being "bad" at all. It was a wonderful church as churches go, but it left me feeling more frustrated than anything. I tried to stay to be a blessing rather than looking to be blessed, something our pastor talked about a lot. But it didn't feel real to me. It felt like I was working my ass off to "do the right thing" but I was really just attempting to please church leadership and do what I thought God wanted me to do, not out of personal conviction but because they said so.
Life's too short for me to waste my time like that. I suddenly stopped caring about what "the church" thought and I stopped viewing my church leadership as, well, leaders. They were no more better or worse qualified to lead than I am. The bit about leaders being "ordained by God" is just ridiculous. It's a GREAT way to control a congregation though. *wry smile*
Clearly and succinctly said, Deb. All I can say is AMEN! :0) Thank you for reading and commenting, my friend.
It's getting easier to speak my truth. A year ago it would have scared me. :)
I'm interested in all religions, too, and I'm sure many people think I'm a horrible Christian but I no longer care what anyone else thinks. :) My creed is love and I think that's pretty sound regardless of religion. It's good to see you, my friend! xo
It's hard for me to explain my relationship with God. I don't go to church and I honestly don't remember many of the stories in the Bible.
I remember being afraid of Hell and Satan. I remember being so scared to contradict anything that was taught to me in Sunday School that I kept my mouth shut and listened, most weeks. LoL Then there were those weeks where I opened my big mouth and ended up being reprimanded for asking a question, like 'Why did He turn her to a pillar of salt just for looking back?','Why did God ask him to kill his son?'
I ususally ended up in the corner.
Now I love God everywhere everyday. He has seen me through many things in my life. My love for him grows with each triumph and trial. He doesn't make all the problems or pain go away but he does cradle me in his arms when I need it. He pushes me forward when I need a shove. He will try to tug me in one direction and smiles at me if I persist in going the other way.
He doesn't care what I wear, or what car I drive, or how much I put in the collection plate. He cares about ME.
xoxo
Not that I needed reminding, but your response to this blog DID remind me why I love you so! =D We should have been childhood friends, dagnabit! I can totally see you in the corner, kicking your feet, waiting for a chance to get out so you can start questioning again!! =D I tended to keep my questions on the inside. I was so afraid of hell. Way more afraid of it than any child ever should be. I think we must have been very similar.
I see God the same way, Chickee. I feel God with me all the time. I don't need to "get right with him" or "spend time with him," because I'm already WITH HIM and that's good enough for both me and God!
♥
A guidepost rather than a destination. I like that. :) I don't know that I'll ever go to a formal church gathering again but I get you, my friend.
Love it, love it, love it!!!! If only more could realize this. I too have not been going to church for the very same reasons. The last one I attended had a number of women who just wanted to sit around in cliques and talk about people of the town. Another church had a member tell me I would go to hell for not speaking in tongues. Hanna goes to a great church that she enjoys with a friend and I may even venture to visit soon. I know someone on my FB who is VERY involved in church. She recently expressed worry as her daughter traveled with a friend from Texas back home to MO. The daughter is around 20. A friend of the mother commented "Christians don't worry". I voiced my feeling that everone worries; whether Christian or not. Such foolishness. That kind of thing is why people are turned off by "Christians". I am a Christian but my mom always told me the definition of it was "Christ within". He does reside within me. This does not make me perfect or in any way above anyone else. I am very much a sinner and one who often messes up. My mom may have given me the wrong term of Christian but I like it for me. I love God and I place my hope and love in Him. I question Him, I get angry with Him, I wonder where He is many times, but I still love Him. I work with a bunch of cackling "Christian" women who love to be so friendly when someone walks into the office and then cackle, laugh, and talk about them as soon as they leave. I keep expecting them to lay a darned egg. But, they do not affect my love and belief in God.
What an awesome writing Katy. I agree with every bit of this! Love, Annette B.
Annette, Imma believe that you said it twice because you felt so adamant! LOL
Love you, my friend!
Love it, love it, love it!!!! If only more could realize this. I too have not been going to church for the very same reasons. The last one I attended had a number of women who just wanted to sit around in cliques and talk about people of the town. Another church had a member tell me I would go to hell for not speaking in tongues. Hanna goes to a great church that she enjoys with a friend and I may even venture to visit soon. I know someone on my FB who is VERY involved in church. She recently expressed worry as her daughter traveled with a friend from Texas back home to MO. The daughter is around 20. A friend of the mother commented "Christians don't worry". I voiced my feeling that everone worries; whether Christian or not. Such foolishness. That kind of thing is why people are turned off by "Christians". I am a Christian but my mom always told me the definition of it was "Christ within". He does reside within me. This does not make me perfect or in any way above anyone else. I am very much a sinner and one who often messes up. My mom may have given me the wrong term of Christian but I like it for me. I love God and I place my hope and love in Him. I question Him, I get angry with Him, I wonder where He is many times, but I still love Him. I work with a bunch of cackling "Christian" women who love to be so friendly when someone walks into the office and then cackle, laugh, and talk about them as soon as they leave. I keep expecting them to lay a darned egg. But, they do not affect my love and belief in God.
What an awesome writing Katy. I agree with every bit of this! Love, Annette B.
Annette, You always make me smile! =D I love your mom's definition of Christian. She's right on!
Our youngest daughter LOVES to go to church and is part of a great youth group. We encourage her to do whatever feels right for her. :0) Our oldest son is very like me, I think. He may pop in here and agree or disagree, but I think I can safely say that he is deeply spiritual but has no use for religion, which astounds me because he was raised so solidly in the church. We were MISSIONARIES, for heaven's sake! :) The thing is, we always taught him to be a critical thinker, to question and quest and search for truth. That's all I want for my children when it comes to spirituality is to find the path that's right for them.
"What if there is no getting right with God there's just 'with God?'"
Wonderful line, Kate! It isn't about rules, rituals, or religion.
That is what Jesus had the hardest time with. None of that makes you "right" with God. What makes you right with God is love, compassion, peace, grace, patience, joy. Those are the notes God plays, and those are the notes that keep us in tune with God. It is then that you are "with God".
As you know, I do still attend church on a regular basis. As I read this blog, I was thinking...why? Why do I still go?
I think one of the main reasons is that I love to sing those praise choruses! I sound so much better when I have others to drown me out!
I can sing on my own, but it just isn't quite as inspirational!
I've been going to a new church the past couple months, and I really, really enjoy this pastor's messages. He drives home the authenticity of the heart and the sinfulness of religiosity. He's a black pastor in his mid 30s; the congregation is about 50% black as well...and being new, I don't really know anyone right now, but his messages inspire me...so I guess I also still go for the inspiration. But here is the weird thing, Kate. As much as I enjoy God and church...most of my friends are outside the church! The people I hang out with...mainly my running friends...are a mix of spiritual and non spiritual people. Most of them go to church, in fact the owner of Fleet Feet has a degree in religios studies and his assistant is a seminary graduate. But there isn't an air of "religiosity" about any of us...in fact, when we get together, the beer flows freely and the laughter is contagious. No one is proselytizing, we all...christian and non-christian alike, just live life as authentically as possible. We celebrate birthdays together, we console each other should the need arise...one of our runners has a daughter with leukemia, basically we just love on each other...and i do believe that is the gospel in a nutshell! Anyway, I'm rambling again. Just keep living your life out in grace, peace, and love and you will be just fine in my book, Kate!
I've heard you sing, Jay, and you don't need a congregation to back you up! :) That being said, I know what you mean about praise and worship. I think that's the only thing I miss about church. Where else can a grown-up go and sing out loud and strong with a bunch of other people, most of whom can't really carry a tune, and just feel love?!
I think I would like your church VERY MUCH. As a tangent, I know a few church Christians who drink beer but they won't own it. They drink on the sly amongst only the most trusted of friends. The rational is they don't want to "cause someone else to stumble." I think it's hogwash. They're more likely worried that they'll be judged. I think it's about time that church Christians stood up and said, "Hey, this is who I REALLY am," and just dropped the pretense.
Oh, who am I to judge? I have my opinions about it all and I'm definitely not in love with the institution of church or the many religions of man.
I love people like you who have an innate sense of spirituality. And you're REAL. I don't hear the same tired old Christian platitudes. For all the talk of "authenticity" in Christian circles, I feel hard pressed to find it.
Love is all there is ...really
The Pharisees asked Jesus about the greatest commandment in the Law (See Matthew 22:36-40). His answer stunned them: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.
THAT is my religion. I do not believe that the bible is the literal, infallible Word of God, but I believe the heartbeat of God is found there: love.
My dear Katy!!! May I insert this please?
"...Brennan Manning wrote The Ragamuffin Gospel "for the bedraggled, beat-up, and burnt-out," the marginalized folks to whom Jesus ministered: the children, the ill, the tax collectors, the women. In other words, the ragamuffins. Manning understands better than most that behind our facades of order and self-assurance are inadequacies that can find healing only in Jesus. While the powerful and religious elite challenged him, Jesus embraced and healed and fed the needs of the ragamuffins. Jesus delivered love, healing, and, most of all, grace..." ~ The Amazon Review
I have this book that is masterfully written by this man that speaks to me on many levels. Your Blog brought tears to my eyes because I agree so much with what you have wrote. When I do attend Church, I attend a "NON-DENOMINATIONAL" Church for a reason, I want to hear about "God's Grace", not what the current rules are or how we need to worship.
Thank you for such a wonderful Blog my dearest of friends! I am a Ragamuffin Christian Katy, beat up by rules that leave my head spinning.
With deep respect and love,
~Calvin
@Calvin
I am a fan of Brennan Manning and love The Ragamuffin Gospel best of all!
I don't feel beat up by the church. The last church we attended was full of sincere, good people. It's not due to anything they said or did that I left the institution of church behind. It simply stopped making sense to me. Did I see things that bothered me: Inconsistencies, hypocrisy, questionable action? Yes. Was I unfairly judged? I believe I was. That being said, where in the world doesn't that happen?!! A church is really a microcosm of the world. People are people and we are ALL inconsistent, hypocritical, and, yes, questionable! LOL I might as well lump myself in with that group.
What I'm trying to say is that I don't perceive our past church as being "bad" at all. It was a wonderful church as churches go, but it left me feeling more frustrated than anything. I tried to stay to be a blessing rather than looking to be blessed, something our pastor talked about a lot. But it didn't feel real to me. It felt like I was working my ass off to "do the right thing" but I was really just attempting to please church leadership and do what I thought God wanted me to do, not out of personal conviction but because they said so.
Life's too short for me to waste my time like that. I suddenly stopped caring about what "the church" thought and I stopped viewing my church leadership as, well, leaders. They were no more better or worse qualified to lead than I am. The bit about leaders being "ordained by God" is just ridiculous. It's a GREAT way to control a congregation though. *wry smile*
Organized religion lost its draw for me years ago. My God is a strong God that believes as much in me as I do him. Faith guides me and no simple man will ever take it away from me or tell me how to "be" in my spirituality.
Clearly and succinctly said, Deb. All I can say is AMEN! :0) Thank you for reading and commenting, my friend.
Wow. That took guts, Katy. I'm really glad you wrote those last two lines as well. Not that everyone will *get* them, of course. But they needed to be said.
@wolfshadesblog
It's getting easier to speak my truth. A year ago it would have scared me. :)
I always say do what you like when it comes to those type of things. ;-) Even during times I've gone to church, I was always a more sparodic here and there type of attendee. If I was going it was likely because I needed the good energy from worshipping with others, and I'll only attend The United Methodist church as far as Christian churches go. I'm also fascinated and loving other religions, particuliarly the Buddhist concepts. Hehe I just kinda like it all--some would say I'm a horrible Christian for that.
I'm interested in all religions, too, and I'm sure many people think I'm a horrible Christian but I no longer care what anyone else thinks. :) My creed is love and I think that's pretty sound regardless of religion. It's good to see you, my friend! xo
This makes me smile from the inside out.
It's hard for me to explain my relationship with God. I don't go to church and I honestly don't remember many of the stories in the Bible.
I remember being afraid of Hell and Satan. I remember being so scared to contradict anything that was taught to me in Sunday School that I kept my mouth shut and listened, most weeks. LoL Then there were those weeks where I opened my big mouth and ended up being reprimanded for asking a question, like 'Why did He turn her to a pillar of salt just for looking back?','Why did God ask him to kill his son?'
I ususally ended up in the corner.
Now I love God everywhere everyday. He has seen me through many things in my life. My love for him grows with each triumph and trial. He doesn't make all the problems or pain go away but he does cradle me in his arms when I need it. He pushes me forward when I need a shove. He will try to tug me in one direction and smiles at me if I persist in going the other way.
He doesn't care what I wear, or what car I drive, or how much I put in the collection plate. He cares about ME.
xoxo
Not that I needed reminding, but your response to this blog DID remind me why I love you so! =D We should have been childhood friends, dagnabit! I can totally see you in the corner, kicking your feet, waiting for a chance to get out so you can start questioning again!! =D I tended to keep my questions on the inside. I was so afraid of hell. Way more afraid of it than any child ever should be. I think we must have been very similar.
I see God the same way, Chickee. I feel God with me all the time. I don't need to "get right with him" or "spend time with him," because I'm already WITH HIM and that's good enough for both me and God!
♥
I don't need to look to a Pastor to seek the face of God. Like Jay, I enjoy the music and take comfort in the unity. Church for me, has become a guidepost pointing the way, not a destination. Love that you wrote this.
A guidepost rather than a destination. I like that. :) I don't know that I'll ever go to a formal church gathering again but I get you, my friend.
Post a Comment